This is true! Go with the flow and let things unfold naturally. People might just be making room for you. Either way, don't play the victim if they don't make the space. It's all a lesson.
I discussed in my post about consistently lucky or unlucky people that we are responsible for every occurrence that happens in our lives. If you’re anything like me (human and occasionally susceptible to outside influences, no matter how much you try), this can be difficult to accept. You don’t want to accept fear or pain as your own doing. Sure, consciously you wouldn’t ACTUALLY want it in your reality. But on some level, you’ve attracted it into your life. This is something the Universe has brought up for me recently.
{Story Time} A couple of years ago, I was in a relationship that was not the most emotionally fulfilling. Against all of my best efforts, this fellow just did not seem to express any kind of emotion towards me. Needless to say, sarcasm and dry humour were abundant. I’d touted this relationship as being the one that had hurt me the most. I had been playing his role in my mind as some awful guy who didn’t want me to feel loved (a little note about music, I had Beyonce’s song Why Don’t You Love Me and Drake’s Find Your Love on repeat during this time in my life – no coincidence there). I had been playing a victim to this situation ever since. Why would I want to accept that I’d attracted heartbreak into my life?
First off, it’s easier. It’s much easier to blame others, at least for a little while until it starts to become a regular occurrence. Second, the victim role lets us avoid admitting that we have things we need to work on. In a culture that prefers perfection to personality (more on this here), admitting that we’re not already “perfect” can be scary.
Well, thanks to the Universe, I’m able to look at this situation with a new perspective now. I realized that I am fully responsible for attracting that specific man into my life. I was so hard on myself during that time. I didn’t accept myself on many levels. I didn’t practice self-love. How can I expect to have attracted others that accept me, when I hadn’t got there myself? I reframed it: He showed me just how painful not loving myself is. It really sucks.
Realizing this was incredibly empowering. It was like a veil had been lifted and I could clearly see that he played a crucial role in my personal development. Thank you Universe for bringing him into my life when you did! I’ve learned that lesson, and I’m ready for a loving, healthy relationship not only with a partner, but with myself.
Where are you playing the victim role? Accepting responsibility for everything that happens to you (not just in relationships) is empowering. It might not be pretty, but self-empowerment feels beautiful.
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I take full responsibility for you being in my life :-p. you’re right. That feels great.
Nice work Tad
That’s great work!
I love this article….thank you for pointing this out. I think I may be doing the same thing… Keep shining and inspiring.
It is crucial to remember that we are absolutely, unequivocably in charge of our choices. Take everything personally, and embrace, with that decision, the responsibility to take charge in your life: it is a very empowering way to lay claim to your awesome ability to create and re-design life. Ask yourself, “How much of your day do you run on autopilot?” Choose, from now on, that you’ll stop being reactive (a “victim”) to life, and instead act on it. Commit yourself to it. And you’ll naturally realize, that even the small choices -towards living a life with purpose-, will induce the beginning of a shift in consciousness and the way you live your life.
LOVEEEEEEEEEEEEE this entire article! Taking responsibility rocks and so do you! Keep up the awesomeness lovey love face! <3
Again Abigail awesome post. Another one that is good to have come more into light now a days in my life. Knowledge is power. Is a related link to another i just commented on…& i am realizing having your train of thought and words (which i relate well too) Is a good thing to have around.
Your an awesome person & your posts, tips..& whole website in general is as well.
Aw thank you so much! So so glad you can relate. I really appreciate your positive feedback
I found the positive feedbacks came really easily….thank you
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Great post! Yes, while admittedly hard at times, we have to be aware of what were are putting out to make sense of what were are attracting back. It is all about self-awareness and self-acceptance, as well as being fully in tune with the present moment.