You know the type. You plan to meet up with them (somewhat reluctantly) with the best of intentions. You promise yourself you’ll be patient, and kind, and a source of unconditional love. And then you see them. They flash you a half-smile and eye roll. Oh crap, what’s wrong now, you think. So you ask, “Hey! How are you? Everything okay?”
Forty-five minutes later…
Cancel that! Back up! Forget I asked!
You’re not a bad person for thinking this. You’ve just had your energy sucked dry! Your compassionate ear has turned into a sounding board for everything that is going wrong in your vampire-friend’s life. They’re sucking the positive energy out of you to fulfill their lack of self-love. It’s not that you don’t want to hear or help them with their problems, but when there’s no comforting them it can be difficult. Not to mention it’s nice to have two-way conversations with your friends. So what do you do?
First of all, breathe. Visualize yourself breathing in love and light energy, filling your body with white light. As you breathe out, visualize all the negative, dark energy leaving your body. Continue for as long as you need. Then, think about the relationship you have with this person. How often do you see them? Do the conversations always go this way? Are they going through a tough time? Are they usually super negative?
Maybe you'd feel better if they weren’t in your life. At all, or perhaps just not as often. I’ve certainly had people in my life that no matter how much I try to be positive and encouraging (even over the course of several years), they don’t want to get out of their funk. In this case, it’s been in my highest interest to distance myself and let go of certain relationships. It can be sad, but this is another way of setting healthy boundaries. You’re telling the Universe what type of people you want in your life, and what kind you don’t. Again, this does not make you a bad person. It makes you an empowered, loving, self-respecting person who knows what you want to attract into your life.
All that being said, sometimes people really just need an ear. Check in with yourself before you start writing people off. You’ll know in your heart if continuing that friendship is a good idea.
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